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I gave them both a tight nod, and we all headed towards the infirmary. As we entered the administration building, Davion asked the question that had been burning in both their minds. “Dude, what in the fuck was that all about?”

  “Yeah,” Lauren spoke up. “What…I didn’t even know you knew Sterling Hale.”

  “I don’t,” I told her. While Cason, Brooks, Zeke, Ivy, and Claire knew about my brief fling with Grace, Davion, Brett, and Lauren didn’t. Even if they weren’t part of the elite crowd at Blackstone, they still went to school here and I hadn’t wanted anyone that attended Blackstone to know about me and Grace. I didn’t need the problems and aggravation rumors about me and Grace would have brought on.

  “You don’t?” Davion asked incredulously. “Then what the hell was that back there?”

  Walking down the hallway towards the nurse’s station, I told them the truth. Or, at least, a piece of the truth. “I don’t know, Hale.” I pulled the tail of my shirt up to my face to dab some of the bleeding over my left eye. “I know Grace.”

  And you could have heard a pin drop.

  “Y…you know Grace Hale?” Lauren asked.

  I let out a painfully tired sigh. “Look, let me get patched up and I’ll fill you guys in later,” I told them. I wasn’t about to give out the details of mine and Grace’s horrible situation, but I knew I had to give them something. They were close friends, and there was no way I could brush off what seemed like an unprovoked attack from Sterling Hale.

  And just as I was about to go into the nurse’s station, Brett came racing down the hallway. “Dudes!” We all turned towards him. “What the fuck?” He was breathing hard, and I imagined that was from running all the way down here. “I was in the courtyard waiting for you guys when someone said you got into a fight with Hale.”

  “Like I was just telling these two, let me go get patched up and I’ll explain later,” I told him. He looked like he wanted to argue-they all did-but eventually they relented and let me head into the nurse’s station.

  I took a seat in one of the plastic, sanitary patient seats, and waited for the nurse to come get me. There was an old-fashion bell that triggered when you opened the door, alerting the nursing staff that someone was here.

  As I sat there and waited for the nurse to come get me, Sterling’s words started reverberating around in my head.

  You win.

  You’ve won.

  I had wanted to tell him he was wrong. I hadn’t won shit. Not only had I lost Grace all over again, I lost a big piece of my self-respect. I had let my hurt control how I treated Grace, and that was not how you loved a person. And make no mistake, I still fucking loved her.

  I still loved her, but instead of taking the path of forgiveness, I took the one of revenge, and all because I was angry that I couldn’t have her. Not to keep, at least. Grace let me fuck her because she felt guilty over how she had treated me. Grace gave into me to alleviate her conscience, not because she loved me back.

  My hands clasped together, I looked down at my busted knuckles, and I knew this wasn’t going to be the last time I tangled with Sterling Hale. I wasn’t going to stay away from his sister, no matter what he said or threatened.

  I wasn’t sure if I could, even if I had wanted to.

  Chapter 17

  Grace~

  I had slept the day away, but my body still felt like it could sleep some more. It was just past four, and I was in the kitchen making something to eat when my phone chimed on the counter.

  London: Here

  The doorbell sang throughout the house, making her text fact. So, I put my sandwich on hold and went to go answer the door. Our parents were gone again, Japan, I think, and had promised to be home next week for winter break, but Sterling and I weren’t holding our breath.

  When I opened the front door, London brushed past me, and when I turned around to face her, she asked, “What in the fuck, Grace?”

  My brows shot up.

  How could she know?

  What did she know?

  “What are you talking about?”

  Her head started swiveling all over the place. “Where’s your brother?”

  I shook my head. “I don’t know,” I told her. “I haven’t seen him since this morning.” I ran my hand down my body. “I just woke up about a half hour ago, or so.” London started biting the bottom of her lip, and I recognized that nervous tick. “What’s going on?”

  “You just woke up?” I nodded. “Was your phone off?”

  “Yeah,” I replied. “I barely turned it back on when I woke up.

  “What were you doing?”

  I jerked my head towards the kitchen. “Making something to eat.” I shook my head. “Are you going to tell me what’s going on?”

  London walked over to me, looped my elbow in hers, and pulled me back towards the kitchen. “I can tell you while you eat,” she said. I just rolled my eyes and let her lead me back to the kitchen.

  Once she was perched on one of the barstools, she said, “Sterling and Styx got into a fist fight this morning.”

  “What?” All the fixings to make a sandwich were on the counter, but the food was immediately forgotten.

  She grimaced. “I wasn’t there, mind you. But I heard Sterling mobbed up to Styx at his locker, called him a motherfucker, and just hit him.”

  My hands few up to cover my shocked expression. “Oh, God,” I muffled behind my hands.

  Her head of brown hair bobbed up and down. “Yep.”

  I lowered my hands from my face, but I noticed they were shaking. “What…what happened?”

  “Like I said, I wasn’t there,” she repeated. “But from what I heard, your brother popped him first, and from there, it turned into a dog fight.” My eyes widened. “People are saying Styx held his own and that it was pretty much a tie by the time the teachers came around and broke it up.” London’s gaze broke really quick before looking at me again. “There are videos on social media of it. I…I didn’t want to watch it without you.” I grabbed my phone off the counter and pulled up the first social media icon on my screen. I didn’t have to look at London to know she was doing the same thing.

  There were notifications everywhere, but I was immediately taken to the video of Sterling and Styx fighting. The video hadn’t captured the beginning of the fight, but it sure captured enough of the fight to see that it had been a brutal tangle. When the teachers had finally broken the two boys apart, it was clear neither one of them had fared better than the other.

  “Holy shit,” London muttered as the video came to an end. When I looked over at her, her blue eyes leveled me with a poignant stare. “What the hell is going on, Grace?”

  I placed my phone back on the counter, food and modesty completely forgotten, I told London everything. Granted, she’d already known almost everything already, but I had told her what had happened in the music room and how I still loved him. She also got more details than Sterling. I didn’t tell her the sexual details, but I told her all the vile things Styx had said to me. And thinking about that video, I’m beyond thankful that I had only told Sterling about Styx’s parting shot. The fight had looked bad, and I couldn’t imagine what Sterling would have done had he known all the details.

  Sterling was a borderline psychopath some days.

  When I was done with my recap, London looked shell-shocked. “Holy shit, Grace,” she breathed out. “I…I have no idea what to say.”

  I finally took a seat next to her. “I don’t think there’s anything to say,” I grumbled.

  London cocked her head at me. “Full disclosure here, I want to sock Styx in his pretty face myself for the stunt he pulled.”

  I knew she wouldn’t understand, but then, strong people rarely did. It was why Sterling couldn’t understand my turnabout. While I’d been confident before, I wasn’t strong. People like London and Sterling, who didn’t care what people thought about them, they were strong. They lived shrouded in a certain kind of magic that gave them power against the mob; the ma
sses who could pull you into their tide if you weren’t careful. And if I’d had even one ounce of their self-awareness, I would never have done what I had done to Styx.

  “I’m not saying he was right, London,” I replied. “I’m just saying he wasn’t wrong.” Then I let out a pathetic laugh. “And let’s not forget that beautiful blonde that was with him at Jacko’s that day. If she’s his girlfriend, I really haven’t changed, have I? I needed my guilt assuaged, so I slept with her boyfriend with no thought to how that would damage their relationship. All because I wanted something I don’t deserve.”

  London threw her palm up. “Okay. I’m going to stop you there, Grace,” she said, her voice taking on a hard edge. “If that girl is Styx’s girlfriend, then you’re beating yourself up for a guy who cheats. And any guy who cheats isn’t worth shit.” I was about to say something, but she shh’d me. “But for argument’s sake, let’s say she isn’t.”

  “God, London, I really, really hope she isn’t,” I sighed. She shot me a stern look, so I shut up.

  “Grace, you’re fighting a battle you can’t win,” she said, not caring how badly the truth hurt. But she was like Sterling in that way. They’d rather hurt you with the truth than disillusion you with a lie. “You can’t fight the past. It’s not possible.” Her face softened. “You can’t erase the person you were back then, Grace. All you can do is change the person you are today. That’s your amends. People say sorry all the damn time and it doesn’t mean shit if it’s just a word with no action behind it.” She let out a sigh. “People are not going to forget the person you were before, Grace. Cruelty stays with people. All you can do is show them the person you are today and hope that they can accept the new person you are and understand that you’ve changed enough to leave the old you behind. But, Grace,” she grabbed my hands and held them in hers, “you have to be willing to leave that Grace in the past, too. And, right now, you’re not doing that. You’re lugging her around with you as some sort of penance, and if you can’t let that girl go, how do you expect everyone else to?”

  My heart hurt.

  I heard her words, and I understood what she was saying, but that still didn’t help me with the one thing that was truly tearing me apart. “And Styx?”

  London’s smile was sad and so full of sympathy as she said, “So, you take the lessons you’ve learned this time around, and the next guy you fall in love with, you show him the real Grace; the better Grace.” I sat there and didn’t say anything as I absorbed her confirmation that I’d never have the chance to forgive Styx for yesterday because he was never going to forgive me for that day, so long ago.

  But before I could fall into another bout of pity, I noticed something on my best friend that I’ve never seen before. “Is that a hickey?”

  My friend just waved her hand at me. “A lapse in judgement that got carried away,” she casually dismissed.

  My eyes were almost bugging out of my head. “Carried away?” I squawked. “You’ve never let a guy mark you before.”

  She rolled her eyes. “Trust me, Grace. It’s not worth the paper I’d need to write home about it,” she said sardonically.

  I leaned forward. “How carried away did this lapse in judgement get?” London Addison blushed, and that’s when I knew. My eyes widened further if you could believe it. “Holy crap, London.”

  “I don’t want to talk about it,” she said. “It really is no big deal.” Right. “Besides, we’re talking about your clusterfuck, Grace. Not my drunken mistakes.”

  There was more to this than London was telling me, but I could tell the topic was making her uncomfortable, so I relented. “Fine,” I replied. “But when my life isn’t a tornado of fucked-up mistakes and regret, I expect details.”

  She gave me sly smirk. “Deal.”

  What a fucking week.

  Chapter 18

  Styx~

  Just as I had predicted, my father had almost disowned me when I had explained about my injuries. Oh, I hadn’t told him the explicit details, but I had told him enough for him to know that I had mistreated Grace in an unforgivable way, and I deserved the injuries Sterling Hale had inflicted upon my person. I had also gone back to the beginning and had told him everything.

  When I had first gone home, he and my mother had immediately insisted on an explanation. Then they had gone into parent-mode and had asked if I was going to lose my entry into Blackstone when I had told them it was Sterling Hale who I had fought. After I had assured them that the fight was not going get me thrown out of Blackstone, that’s when they had demanded answers. There was no way I could tell my mother, and so, I had pleaded with my father to keep this between us as men. My mom hadn’t liked it, but she respected me, and so, she had respected my decision.

  After telling my dad everything, he had shown great restraint in not kicking my ass. And then, he’d had the nerve to tell me I wasn’t in love with Grace. I had been so pissed, he had to calm me before continuing with explaining his statement.

  I listened as he told me that I couldn’t possibly be in love with Grace because anything worth a man’s love is worth whatever battle he has to fight to keep and preserve it. He pointed out-brutally, might I add-how I hadn’t fought for her during our summer together by not making my intentions clear. He pointed out how I hadn’t fought for her when she had ended things two years ago. And he pointed out how I hadn’t fought for her when I had her right where I had wanted her, and I had chosen to push her away with my cruelty, rather than fight for her with the truth. And because his words hadn’t already done enough damaged, he had stated-quite clearly-that if my mom ever thought to leave him, she’d have to kill him first before he’d let that happen.

  And then he really cut me to the quick when he had said that if he didn’t believe that I was in love with her, and he was my father, why on earth would Grace or her brother believe that I was in love with her.

  I hadn’t slept for shit all weekend.

  And now, it was Monday morning, and I was headed towards her locker because, fuck Sterling Hale. Fuck two years ago. Fuck my broken heart. And fuck what I did on Thursday.

  I was going to fight for Grace Hale.

  And it looked like I was going to have to fight for her in more ways than one because, as I approached her locker, she was standing comfortably too close to Patton Ridley.

  I bore down on them like I had the right. “Am I interrupting?”

  Grace gasped. But then, her eyes widened as she got a good look at my face. I looked exactly as I should, having been at the receiving end of Sterling Hale’s fists. “Styx…”

  And then Patton decided to speak to me in the way these uppity fucks had been raised to do. “As a matter of fact, you are,” he said. “Not that it’s any of your business, but I’m asking Grace out on a date.”

  This was probably going to get me kicked out of Blackstone, but my father’s words had hit their mark this weekend. And I knew he wouldn’t care if I got kicked out of Blackstone if it was over Grace. So, I grabbed her arm and yanked her behind me. I was about an inch taller than Patton, so there was that. “Grace is mine, Ridley,” I told him. “So, no. She won’t be going out with you this weekend or any other.”

  Patton threw out a condescending laugh. “Yeah, right,” he smirked. “Like I’m supposed to believe that Grace Hale is dating you.” He laughed like it was the funniest thing he’s ever heard, and-to be fair-it probably was. “Aim a little closer to your skill level, Reinhart.”

  But before I could comment, Grace spoke up. “You know, Patton,” she said clearly and forcefully, “before this moment, I thought you were a nice guy. But I can clearly see that you aren’t.” And then my heart almost exploded inside my chest with her next words. “Even if I wasn’t dating Styx, I’d still never go out with you, seeing how easy it is for you to be mean and condescending.”

  His eyes almost popped out of his head. “Are you kidding me?” he screeched like a girl. “Are you seriously telling me you’re dating him?” Before s
he could confirm her earlier words, the first warning bell for class rang, and Sterling Hale walked up on us.

  Fucking great.

  The only concession to be had was that he looked just as badly as I did. “What’s going on?”

  Patton was flapping his gums before Grace or I could say anything. “Reinhart intruded on me and Grace, trying to tell me Grace was his.” He scoffed. “Can you believe it?”

  Hale crossed his arms over his chest. “And what did Grace say?” I was a little surprised we weren’t already throwing blows, but I was also curious to see where this was going.

  Patton’s head reared back, stunned that Sterling wasn’t automatically backing him up. I could understand it. We’d been beating the shit out of each other just last week. Why wouldn’t Hale automatically team up against me.

  “Well…she…she said they were dating. But-”

  Sterling uncrossed his arms and stepped to Patton. “So, he says they’re dating, and she says they’re dating.” Patton nodded. “So, what the fuck is the issue, Ridley?”

  “He thinks Styx isn’t good enough for me,” Grace clarified softly.

  Then the male Hale pierced me with a look that made him look ten years older. “Are you?”

  I could feel my lip curling in a snarl. I felt like threats were coming at us, left and right, and I knew it was only going to get worse when the word got out, but I was up to the fight.

  Against anyone.

  “No,” I answered honestly. “No one is, as far as I’m concerned.” Sterling lifted a brow. “But she’s mine, regardless.” Then I stepped up to her brother to show him what I was about. “And we were never even. I didn’t win. I only win if I have Grace.”

  Sterling didn’t comment at first. I could tell he was mulling something over in his head, and he wasn’t going to rush it. And Patton was a nonfactor by now.

  Several more seconds later, Hale gave me a tight nod and stepped back to stand next to his sister. I knew what this was. This was him giving me the chance to prove myself. And if I didn’t want the guy as my shadow while I dated his sister, then I needed to pass his test.